Friendship and Issues - Amit Vishwas FB ~ IFBT On Web

Came with a long crap again ! Hope you will read and respond.

Friendship & Issues

When you are friends, you usually have quarrels,

Quarrels, which are temporary but can become long lasting.But it matters what you lost and what you got after it !

Writing about few points which should be thought ( according to me) about friendship.

Likes and Dislikes-

Again, it also matters that whether the reason of my 'bad reaction' is worth or not !

Obviously it does if what You did is not correct !

If I don't like something and you are making a joke with me then I might be not liking it, its ok if you are good to me so I will tolerate till a limit, If a mutual of us make the same joke with me, I might not like (because I already don't like/do such joke) . This cause a quarrel.

Equal Importance -

If you give/take equal Importance with different few people, doesn't mean you get a right to behave equal things with all, all's nature might not be same ! If they won't tell you doesn't mean you will repeat the things along a few more people to him ! For example If you think , in a group all should agree on a common thing, that is not possible always, so basically each person have to keep a little bit care of each other ! If you are making me agree your point of view and I wantedly can't agree with that ! For example, being a writer and a thinker (i don't say i am perfect) and I've always been written about nature, nation and society on my social accounts ! I can't agree with a thing to you if I share my views for awareness against that thing ! If you want me to join you in a vulgar joke on a girl's part, I can't agree nor I will tolerate, because I think if I get a nature like this, some day I may comment on your sister unknowingly ! And who knows some of your friend has such nature and he has such feeling for your girl too ?

(many things i wrote is mismatched with the heading, i have some reasons for it, please keep scrolling down).

Comparison -

If you compare yourself with me or another friend, then for sure the discussion can move to a quarrel . You always want to lead ignoring the facts you should understand ! If I am asked about behavior to do with two different friends from my side, i have to think once. I usually keep same thoughts for all. If I can't listen a word for you from someone else, I can't listen that word for him too from your mouth ! do mind this, this can again make a quarrel ! If you expect me ''usne bolaa tune sun liya' then you must think someone else is also having the same expectations from me ! If I take your things personally, I take his things too. A very good example for it .

I've been seen many friends commenting on personal relationships, Suppose you have a girlfriend and I talk about her curves, and you won't ask me to shut up because for you the friendship is more important ! then it prove 2 things , 1st - You are a fucker not a lover and she is a bitch for you ! 2nd - I am a bastard too , even if you are not in a serious relation with u, but she is in a serious relation with some good people around her ! so just because her boyfriend is my friend , does she deserve this behavior from me and you ? If its a joke ! sorry... make such jokes on your private people and understand the shit !

this was just an example ! all I meant to say being a friend you don't get all the rights ! if you do it with your other friends, then you are great _/\_

Taking Side Of One-

If two of your friends are quarreling and you take side of one , who is wrong at some points (or not) then too you are moving to a quarrel ! You should better find a level where first both of them can calm down and think on the reason of the quarrel and the solutions with peace. If you take one's side and you are fixed with your decision or give up saying sarcastically " Are you done ? Ok you won'' can hurt the ego of the next. Yeah.. usually its a better way to end the quarrel but sometimes !

Over Reaction-

Sometimes you just overreact on some topic while you expect something from your friend and wont get, then you have to give a natural reaction according to your expectation ! You do more and it leads to a quarrel ! For example - If you talk something to me on regular basis and I don't wanna start an argument so I stay silent, and if one day I speak a word against it and you react like I did a big nonsense , then first you must think that till now even I was not with you in that talk and I was letting the talk be one sided ! means I was never joined with you in that kinda talk even before.

Familiarity-

It matters too, you are not supposed to be familiar to a person so soon to get rights to do whatever you do with your older friends or 'your type' friends ! He might not be of your type ! If you have already a friend circle where you don't have any limits to create so called #Mahoul (environment) ! And you are being so familiar to make your #Mahoul with me, Again this is gonna be an issue of quarrel . Because I don't give a #FUCK to such MAHOUL where you present your mentality which is ill ! Yeah i agree that sometimes your new friend is much more better then your oldest ! But this doesn't always happen ! If you think 'to enjoy a Mahoul you all should go extreme and if one is not going then he is spoiling it' .. Then I think you should better not add him to the party because he can have his issues. What you think whether its valid or invalid, depends on you ! But if his issues are morally and with fact true, the rest all are stupids !

Blaming -

If you start with an small argument and start blaming each other, the situation can become worse . Sometimes this even clear what you think of other and what he does but in most cases you speak something in anger what you should not have to and that may hurt the other and you too ! Blaming doesn't only include pointing the next person for a mistake, but also commenting on the person's behavior , nature or routine too! Sometimes before blaming the thing you must think whether what he has done is really related with the reason of the argument ? If you do this , you never admit your mistake (I know, I too do this while quarrel but later I clear it) !

So .. many more things are there !!

Expect the things only what the next can get u !
If you think you should be preferred in some case and you are not done that time, then find out the importance of the reason of the next person's first preference that moment , if he doesn't have a proper reason then you can raise your finger .
If you don't wanna get ignored, don't do the things repeatedly what the next don't like, if he will not get habituated of you, he will start ignoring you.
Things are in your hand, you can always rectify your parts and make the next realize that he should too do so !

If someone has better views and ideas, keeping your ego in your pocket you should respect his views.

''A friend in need is a friend indeed''

Is not always true !
Sometime a friend might not be there in need, And sometimes an enemy could be there in need. A friend is actually a person who can make you feel comfort in good and bad situation being there or not being there. And a friendship is called that relation which allows you let be together and make the moments happy and better ! Happy and better for you all and the rest all too !

Because if a friendship and the created Mahoul is spreading negative vibes around its an insult of friendship itself !

I may be not correct with my points ! You may happily leave my company ! I have some philosophies for my own, and I can't compromise with it.

If I should do, if I need to improve them or if I need rectification !then let me know ! If something is missing in this post and If something needs changes, Let me know. Thanks fir reading till the end .

-Amit Vishwas